Why? Why? Why? There are other trees to pillage. Life was joyous the last few weeks when he was busy eating all the pine cones off my pine tree. I just walked outside to pick the first apple from my new fall crop. It was the nice big one one near the top that I’ve been watching for weeks and today was the day it would be ready to eat. But it’s gone. Stolen by that mangy, rat-faced, no-good, low-life, beady-eyed, scum-sucking, apple-stealing squirrel! I saw him eating it right there under the tree and ran outside as if I could actually catch him. In three seconds, he was up on the roof and gone. And so was the apple I guess because it was no where to be found. This is totally unacceptable. I am so mad!!!!!! I have to do something. But what? Home Depot doesn’t sell land mines.