{"id":1386,"date":"2010-09-05T21:41:28","date_gmt":"2010-09-06T04:41:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/?p=1386"},"modified":"2010-09-05T21:41:28","modified_gmt":"2010-09-06T04:41:28","slug":"officer-it%e2%80%99s-not-my-gun","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/officer-it%e2%80%99s-not-my-gun\/","title":{"rendered":"Officer, it\u2019s not my gun."},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/09\/mug-shot1.jpg\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-1388\" title=\"mug shot\" src=\"http:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/09\/mug-shot1-300x195.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"150\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>I was arrested at the Newark airport in 1984 for trying to board an airplane with a gun.\u00a0 I was on the road doing standup and I believed as long as it wasn\u2019t loaded, I could take my 38 Special on the plane.\u00a0 That was not the case.\u00a0 I was arrested and handcuffed and put in the back seat of a police car.\u00a0 On the way to jail, I thought of all the things I could say to avoid having to include \u201cconvicted felon\u201d on my resume.\u00a0 Things like: \u201cI\u2019ve already been on nine flights with my gun \u2013 what\u2019s the problem?\u201d -or- \u201cI\u2019m from L.A. so I\u2019m pretty sure your New Jersey laws wouldn\u2019t apply to me.\u201d\u00a0 -or- \u201cYou can dust me for gun residue, I haven\u2019t shot anybody.\u201d \u00a0-or- \u201cWhen I said I killed them in Cleveland, I meant my act.\u201d \u00a0It never occurred to me to say, \u201cOfficer, it\u2019s not my gun.\u00a0 And this is not my suitcase.\u00a0 And those things are what?\u00a0 Are you serious? Bullets?\u00a0 I thought they were gum!\u201d\u00a0 Com\u2019on!!<\/p>\n<p>*To Guess my Mileage, go to the Sept. 1st posting &#8211; Three More Days!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was arrested at the Newark airport in 1984 for trying to board an airplane with a gun.\u00a0 I was on the road doing standup and I believed as long as it wasn\u2019t loaded, I could take my 38 Special on the plane.\u00a0 That was not the case.\u00a0 I was arrested and handcuffed and put [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1386","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dear-diary","category-general"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1386","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1386"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1386\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1395,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1386\/revisions\/1395"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1386"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1386"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1386"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}