{"id":8715,"date":"2025-12-23T13:36:12","date_gmt":"2025-12-23T21:36:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/?p=8715"},"modified":"2026-01-02T09:41:45","modified_gmt":"2026-01-02T17:41:45","slug":"%f0%9f%8e%84%e2%9c%8d%ef%b8%8f-my-poem-to-santa-%f0%9f%8e%84%e2%9c%8d%ef%b8%8f","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/%f0%9f%8e%84%e2%9c%8d%ef%b8%8f-my-poem-to-santa-%f0%9f%8e%84%e2%9c%8d%ef%b8%8f\/","title":{"rendered":"\ud83c\udf84\u270d\ufe0f My Poem To Santa \ud83c\udf84\u270d\ufe0f"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Santa, you\u2019ve known me since I was a kid,
\nRemember when I wanted a teapot with a lid?
\nYou came through then, and lots of times after,
\nWhen I wanted cartoons, you brought me laughter.<\/p>\n

But then as a teen I begged you and pleaded
\nFor something I desperately wanted & needed.
\nI didn\u2019t ask for skates or some rubix cubes, \ud83d\udefc
\nMy request was simple\u2026 Just give me some boobs.<\/p>\n

You either got people\u2019s letters but didn\u2019t read them,
\nOr you simply decided I didn\u2019t need them.
\nI was mad at you all year \u2018cuz my boobs didn\u2019t grow,
\nBut then by my twenties, I gave you another go.<\/p>\n

\u201cSanta,\u201d I wrote, \u201cthere\u2019s something else that I need,
\nIt\u2019s important to me so I\u2019ll beg and I\u2019ll plead. \ud83d\ude4f
\nYou owe me for the boob thing, so now here goes:
\nI got my mother\u2019s eyes but my dad\u2019s big nose.\u201d \ud83e\udd78 \ud83d\udc40<\/p>\n

You remember me asking if you can make it teeny?
\nYou wrote back and said, \u201cI\u2019m Santa \u2013 not Houdini!\u201d
\nIn spite of your rejections, I continued to believe,
\nSurely my next ask, I\u2019m bound to receive.<\/p>\n

So at 40 I gave it another shot,
\nAbout those boobs, maybe you just forgot.
\nI could use them now, even more than ever,
\nYou said, \u201cWhen do you want them? How about never?\u201d<\/p>\n

Boobless and hopeless, I wanted something for me,
\nSo I bought implants on sale \u2013 buy one get one free!
\nThey\u2019re gone now and that is good news,
\nBut there\u2019s still one more thing I can actually use.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m 79 now and my boobs finally grew,
\nBut when I look down I feel kind of blue.
\nYou sent my boobs but something\u2019s bothering me\u2026.
\nCan you change them from a 34-LONG to a 34-B? \ud83d\ude00<\/p>\n

\ud83c\udf84 Merry Christmas, everyone! \ud83c\udf84<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Santa, you\u2019ve known me since I was a kid, Remember when I wanted a teapot with a lid? You came through then, and lots of times after, When I wanted cartoons, you brought me laughter. But then as a teen I begged you and pleaded For something I desperately wanted & needed. I didn\u2019t ask […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[73,23],"class_list":["post-8715","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-funny-christmas-poem","tag-jenny-jones"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8715","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8715"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8715\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8733,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8715\/revisions\/8733"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8715"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8715"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyjones.com\/myblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8715"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}