CANADA
CALIFORNIA
U.S.A.It was 85 degrees today! We sat out on the patio in the afternoon but I didn’t enjoy it. What’s to enjoy when the hot sun keeps melting the umbrella on your mai tai! 😉
It was 85 degrees today! We sat out on the patio in the afternoon but I didn’t enjoy it. What’s to enjoy when the hot sun keeps melting the umbrella on your mai tai! 😉
1. Wesley Snipes is in prison, serving 3 years for tax evasion. He owed the IRS 15 million dollars. Before you judge him for being stupid, he may be smarter than you think. He does nothing for 3 years and wipes out 15 million in debt. That’s 5 million a year – plus free meals. Genius!
2. Who owns the Dodgers? Jamie and Frank McCourt are spending millions on lawyers to see who owns the Dodgers. Their former lawyer admitted that he doctored the community property agreement to make Frank the sole owner and now the judge has voided that agreement. If I were that former lawyer, I’d be far away, with a fake moustache, in a witness protection program… and open to a sex-change.
 3. David Hasselhoff’s new reality show has already been cancelled after just two episodes. First DWTS and now this?  What happened, Hoff? Your new show is off. That is toff. They didn’t even tune in to scoff. I guess they’ve had enoff of the Hoff.
 4. Rob a bank without a ski mask.  Bad guys are robbing banks using special effects masks, like an old man, and they’re fooling everybody. I would use a Mel Gibson mask. You wouldn’t need a gun. Anyone would give you money just to leave and not come back.
 5. “Off with their Heads!” British students are angry that their university fees are being tripled so they gathered on the streets to protest. Not a good time for Charles and Camilla to cruise by in their 1977 vintage Rolls-Royce Phantom VI. The classic car was struck with fists, sticks and bottles, breaking a window and splattering it with paint. Even Camilla was poked with a stick. I think it was a 10-foot pole.
I went out today just to take pictures. Â It’s autumn in Hollywood and some of the trees feel like it’s the east coast. Â It was brisk, too, about 50 degrees -brrrr! Â This tree was spectacular so I just pulled over and grabbed my camera. Â On the way home I was stopped at a light and spotted a guy at the ATM in his pajamas! And they didn’t even match! Â My camera was in the back seat or he would have been my featured photo. Plus he seemed to be unable to get the machine working. Here, let me paint a visual picture for you: About 25 years old, pajama bottoms with black and white dogs on them, pajama top an orange and blue plaid, black open-back slippers. The only possible explanation was that he was just going down to get his mail, tripped and fell on his head, thought he was still home, & was trying to get some more beer out of the fridge.
This morning I spotted two deer on the back hill so I got my camera and went out to take a picture. They usually don’t run from me but this time, just as I raised my camera, they bolted up the hill faster than I’ve ever seen them move. Â Oh well, no photo this time.
Seconds later, before I even lowered the camera, this coyote approached from the side, moving like he had a mission. This was the only photo I got before he was gone. I don’t know why he didn’t chase them up the hill  – maybe he was hunting for a lighter snack.  Can I interest you in some organic filet of gopher? Maybe some skunk tartare? Snake on a stick?
And the winner is… Rosey, a graduate student from Michigan, with the closest guess of 240!
Congratulations, Rosey!
There were 241 m&m’s in the jar.
Below is a picture of all the candies:
Thanks, everybody, for playing. I love doing contests and giving away money. 🙂
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It’s freezing here is Southern California, literally below zero at night. So when my hands get cold, I look for the warmest place to warm them up. That would be Denis’ armpits.
It’s the perfect combination: two warm pits, two cold hands. If he’s wearing a flannel shirt, it’s gotta be over a hundred in there! The downside for him is he can’t really move, unless we walk in one direction together since he’s free to drink some water or answer the phone. It only takes 5 minutes to warm up and then he’s free to go. Â I told you I had a good man.
p.s. It doesn’t work as well when he’s naked.
If you could use a $100 Visa gift card for Christmas, all you have to do is guess how many candies are in the jar.
The candies are almond m&m’s and the jar stands 7 1/2-inches tall from the top of the hat to the bottom of the jar.
Whoever guesses the closest without going over…WINS!
One guess per person. Winner will be revealed Friday.
Good luck!
Back in August, I had an episode of arrhythmia (I could feel my heart beating in my throat) and wound up seeing to a cardiologist who had me wear a heart monitor to see if I had heart disease or if I might need a pacemaker. At the time, I was cleared and in fact, the arrhythmia disappeared in a few weeks. I never imagined I would have a cardiologist but I sure was glad everything was okay. —- Fast forward to last week: I went to my regular long-time doctor for an annual physical including a blood test. He called me today with the results and I was surprised he was calling on a Saturday of a long weekend. He had never called on a weekend before so it made me anxious. He told me my total cholesterol, which had been elevated, was good and so was my LDL. I said that was good news. “But I have some bad news,” he said. “I’m sorry to have to tell you this,” he went on to say, “but you are going to find out anyway.” I could feel a knot in the pit of my stomach and I started to sweat. “It was just 3 months since you saw your cardiologist,” he said as I tried to remember what was on my bucket list. My heart was pounding! Give it to me straight, doc! What have I got – six months? But I’m still working on my cookbook. Why is he taking so long?? I can handle the truth – just tell me. “Your cardiologist died.”
What? That’s great! … NO! Not great! … But good news! … No, it’s not! Not good news, not for him, but good for me. That’s wrong too. Not good for anybody. How can I feel sad for him when I was just pulled back from the long dirt nap. No doctor should ever say, “I have bad news,” unless you’re the one who’s dying! Now I hate myself for being glad, and the stress of this is making my blood pressure rise and my heart is beating in my throat. OMG, I think my arrhythmia is back!
“Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving.” -W.T. Purkiser
